Regret your love affair

Past love: "I always ask myself: what would have happened if ..."

He is married but still loves his ex. She dreams of someone else and longs for him. What it's like not to be able to forget an old love.


Read on one side

Regardless of whether you are happy in a new partnership or satisfied single: Some people still stay in your head. An old love that keeps creeping into your thoughts, everyday life and dreams - do you know that? We asked our readers that. Stories about longing, nostalgia and sometimes regret have reached us. People have told us about affairs, summer flirtations, their first big love or an old love with whom they were never together. Here are some of the answers.

Lisa, 24 years
"I keep thinking of a past love with which nothing real ever happened: a boy I met at a festival. I know that he is active in the German Alpine Association and when I am on hiking trails I sometimes think he is could come walking towards me. "

Finja, 36 years
"Even though I now have children and live in my own house, the thought always comes up: 'What would have happened if ...' I know that I still love him, but I love my wife just as much Made a decision for my wife and for this family. But the pain of losing him remains. "



Be there live online when our podcasts are created and meet your favorite hosts at the first ZEIT ONLINE podcast festival on Sunday, June 20, 2021.

Many Thanks! We have sent you an email.

Check your mailbox and confirm the newsletter subscription.

The newsletter subscription is preceded by registration. With your registration you take note of the data protection regulations.

Jan, 30 years
"She was 17 and part of our clique. She loved indie music and was the most positive person I have ever met. Perhaps for me she is the symbol of youthful joy and innocence."

Laura, 29 years
"When I drink cocoa, I think of him because he always made me cocoa and a cherry stone pillow when I wasn't feeling well. It makes me cry to write that to you. I think that means it's not just one Form of nostalgic love, but also regret is. "

M., 52 years
"I am married and until a year ago I had an intimate affair with another married man. He eventually separated from me because his wife found out about it and demanded a decision.

Whenever I hear music that reminds me of that time, or I cook dishes that we both liked, my heart contracts. I would like to talk to him, touch him, kiss him, lie in his arms, smell him. But it just doesn't work anymore.

Sometimes I can smile and enjoy what we had in common, but sometimes I cry terribly and I could scream in pain. I love my husband, but what I feel for him, my lover, remains one of the strongest feelings in my life. "

"I think if you really love someone, really from the bottom of your heart, then you give a part of your soul and always take part of the other with you."

Reader, 42 years
"For 20 years I have been dreaming of the great love of my school days. Every time the next morning I feel as if someone has held me tight all night. I enjoy it - it's like a gift that I neither with my children still have to share with my current partner. "

Barbara, 70 years
"I've been divorced since 1987. We were married for twelve years and have three children together. I loved my husband very much. He passed away last summer. I kept thinking of him because he made my life richer."

Luca, 22 years
"My first boyfriend was my first great love. I'm glad we ended our relationship six years ago, and yet I keep thinking of him. I still remember exactly what he smells like."